Thank you, Commander. I would repeat a little bit because I'm making this as much for Ronces as I am for anybody, although every one of you better listen to it very carefully. I said and I repeat, I cannot give you confidence. That is something you must have. That is a state of being. Self-esteem is a state of being. I can give you all the reasons why you have the perfection that you ought to be ashamed of yourself for not having the confidence. But I cannot make you see it. I cannot make you know it. I cannot make you do anything about it. We can give you the support and the love and the caring and all of the information that we can offer. But I will repeat, if it were building and feeding and so forth that you want to do, you would not be waiting, you would be doing it. And you better believe they'd sure like to have more, and I would like to be able to give you more. But you see, when you base all of the reasoning on that commodity, which is also physical, you won't do it yet. There will never be enough, do you see, to answer all the needs that you perceive this moment. If you just had, if you just had the money and you just had the contract and you just knew that there was a bottomless pit of it to pour in on you while you're learning, you have to creep and crawl. And if the direction is proper toward God, all of the assistance that you can get from the host and everyone else will help you. But you've got to do it yourself. And you've got to find your own direction. And if it's to go to school until you make your passage, then I guess you'll have to go to school until you make your passage.

I can't do it for you.

Go on, please. You see, it bothers me because I would do it for him. I see so clearly what he's reaching for. And I can't, I mustn't. Go on, I'm sorry, I interrupted my interruption. I wouldn't do it, but it's her birthday and

honor her so I you know. This nation is but one paycheck from the streets and a better message needs to be spoken to the people. Many of my friends look so lost and I feel bad for them that I cannot help them as I would like. I would like to either graduate very quickly or get off student loans. Money rules in this world and we are all enslaved to it one way or the other. I would like to be free of the government altogether. Without you and Sananda...

No, he wouldn't. He certainly wouldn't. He just said that he wouldn't. He's on student loans and other government help. He certainly doesn't want to be free of the government.

Without you and Sananda, surely we would be lost and fail. Help me to help others. In my own way, I try to help people to my own detriment. I keep saying college is for me, but I know it will be for them. Sometimes I get so overwhelmed I forget things, like writing this letter weeks ago. With 56 journals, 67 tapes, and a drawer full of liberators and contacts.

56 journals did it, son. There are now 112. And almost 300 tapes. And 300 tapes, I am informed. You would think I would be content, but I am not.

I don't want anyone content either.

I want you at peace within, but I want you just as restless as hell. Contentment never builds anything, and I have to admit other imperfection while I think of it. I am so rarely imperfect that I must point it out in case I'm found out. He will be looking for a writing from the 17th of May. That is one of the writing, but I gave him the wrong journal for that one. That would be T. The one he's looking for is June 4th, but I believe it is 1991.

Thank you.

and I hate to interrupt, but things when they pass through. Go on, please. Over the weeks and months I have considered this letter, and perhaps you can glean from it the problems I feel most of us in this gross limitation are experiencing. Yes, that's why we're doing this.

The sleepers are still asleep around me, and my experiment of writing for the college newspaper has little effect. Those of like mind are few. What is the secret of awakening the sleepers, me included? I can't be there in California to ask these questions and since you do not reply by letter, perhaps you can discuss these things on tape.

Uh-oh!

and a lot of gold which you could provide...

laughter

and a lot of gold which you could provide Bo if I am to stay here.

The gold is for survival businesses. People need to work for an honest wage. I am not in the habit of asking like this of you, but you are a source of the source. If I do not ask now, things are going to get mighty desperate later on. Send somebody, an angel of your host, perhaps, to enlighten us. We have been deceived so long. I long for to see you and be with the host in this age. What I am doing now seems so redundant. I need to accomplish things that are going to save a few people's lives. Many things can be done in Deming, but it is going to take many resources in order to do it.

You know what? I have to be perfectly honest. I'm not interested in saving anybody's lives. This is no life. This is an illusion. And he's interested... he thinks he's saying, you know, get them turned around and headed the right direction. But as long as you have the perceptions that if I just had some gold and got rid of the government and you gave me some direction that it all work out happily forever after, no it won't. And there is no point in trying to fool you. This world is going to depopulate it. And I'm not going to stop him. God is not going to stop him. This is a world of physical experience and expression. And you're going to get turned around because that is the intent of soul. Or you're not going to get turned around. So anybody working under the illusion that you just become the leader of an army with enough gold and enough food and enough this and enough that and we are going to have the space brotherhood whisk this group off and that group off so that it is no longer too crowded and we are going to get rid of AIDS and we are going to get rid of cancer and we are going to get rid of death of the body. What in the world are you talking about. You are locked into misunderstanding before you start. Life and reality is out there. You are not a body. And to suggest that we're going to save a few lives or we're going to save everybody on the planet, you better believe it. There is room in the universe for all of the beings that are on your place. And let me tell you something else. There not only is room for all of the beings and souls on your place, but they're out here, except for the ones that are there, are on some other physical escapade. Because the you that is expressing in that, quote, is a mechanical life, an imitation life. And until you can understand, and that's what knowing is, but you must understand and accept this before you can ever possibly understand the greater. And to think that I am going to provide gold and direction for you just to save a few lives when I am not interested in your cotton-picking mechanical lives. We are going through this exercise so that possibly you can give other souls on that place an opportunity to grow in a free society. It always happens when evil takes over to the extent that there is no freedom of any type, then something has to happen. Because you are just as unbalanced as you would be if everything were good. And you don't at this moment know how good it is. It is good. And if you let it be bad, then you've allowed it. And it's certainly not going to be my help. You have all you need between your ears, if you used it. And it only takes one of God Creator power. One evil being cannot do it because all he can do is manipulate, and he has, and you've lost it. And if it only takes one to create the havoc, because that's all he can create, is havoc and chaos. And right on your dollar bill it says it's been successful. And why? Not because of lack of gold. Those are worthless printed Federal Reserve notes that tell you everything right on that bill, right on that piece of paper.

What's happened to you?

They have brought chaos. That was their purpose, and they've done it, and they've been successful. And the minute they established the Federal Reserve was their nanny, nanny, nanny on the birthday of the Illuminati. And the Illuminati was nothing but a restructuring and a final direction for the Freemasonic movement, which was birth of evil. Now why should I fix that for you? I ain't. And until you can know that you live in a play that you have created, I may be writing the script for how we're going to get out of this because my people were going to get out. If you don't care enough to get out with me, that's fine because you can do this over and over and over and over. And most of the ones in here have already done it and gone and parked and come back to make it possible for those other unknowing beings to find their way and get off this wheel. You are the guides. You are the guides, come back. And if all you're doing is waiting to spend some time on a spacecraft looking for the hosts, you're not going to find your purpose. Unless, of course, that is your purpose. That's up to you. If you are advanced enough to be searching for what you know you ought to be searching for, then you're advanced enough to know that what I say here is true. And it only is going to require one in the full knowledge to get you back to God. That's not the point. The point is to reclaim that goodness so that you can rebirth some freedom and then you have a playground where you can possibly grow up through this. You are teaching nothing if you just out force somebody. This proves you're bigger, stronger, clever. And they already have this conflict going. That's the game. That's the plan. You're going to find the Rothschilds all the way through this. You supported all the wars right out of the United States. Their point is to build chaos and get everybody at everybody, but at the right time and the right place to further their goal. And if your goal is just to get in touch with a host on some flying saucer, then your goal is wrong. It is not my goal, so don't look for this host. My job here is not to give rides. You'll get your rides, you've had your rides, you know how to build the ships. So don't dump your load on me. I'm doing my job. Go on, please.

Many things can be done in Deming, but it is going to take many resources in order to do it. Since no one will hire me, I can start businesses and work for myself.

Endemming? I doubt it.

It is either I am too old or too white. I am looking into the possibility of setting up a network as well. These are only ideas because I haven't the money to back those ideas up. Please help us, I pray, tomorrow is so uncertain, and we still look to the skies for redemption, as well as within. We need to become confident, so allow us the sight of Sananda, that we may know the truth.

Sananda is all around you. That is like saying, show me God, and I'll believe. Go look at the tree, go look at the grass, go look at yourself. You're a perfection. You've just spoiled it. And don't be looking for your redemption in the sky. That is a rapture. That is silly. Your redemption is not in the sky. Your redemption is in your soul between you and God. Every time. Go on.

Allow us 40 days as a start that we may learn first hand in our consciousness.

I will. We'll let it rain 40 days and 40 nights. Or how about 40 years with no rain? How do you get on that? Well, I want him to go back to Moses.

Oh, there we go.

Thank you, Commander, for being our liberator, contact, and hope. Oh, I just blew it. I just said I'm not your liberator, I'm not your redeemer, I am a contact, but I'm not a very good one because it's a one-way street here on in. it. There are 500 at least letters parked aside in a box waiting for personal instruction from Hatton. Dorma cannot do it. And if you can't find me and receive and I just talk and talk and talk and talk. You don't hear. You're looking for the wrong thing. And yet each one of you in every circumstance, once you sit down to write, you know your answers. You tell them. And money doesn't fix it. Money does not fix it. Money is a tool. A tool. There's no way to answer all these letters. If you want your answers to such what I consider silly questions when you already know the answer, then go to a psychic. Just go right down to your fortune teller and let her read your cards. That's what you want. You'll never get it from me.

Never.

I'll hold your hand. I'll carry you I'll do whatever is required to get your soul to its right position but you're going to do this yourself and until you get your thinking straightened around and stop the cop out I don't have this I don't have that you are a man of God and you have everything you need. You're just not doing it. And if your sights are truly fixed, which are not, you can tell by the way the letter is written. This is to Ron and all of you. He knows what's the matter. And if you can't do it in Deming, get out of there. But don't think there's going to be some other magic place. Although, I doubt you can build a gourmet restaurant in a two-population town, or a

hundred.

Who will come? And if you cannot get a position in the town, then obviously you are staying in the wrong place because God is not going to do it for you. You make your luck. And it would be nice, wouldn't it? And yet I feel the same resentment that I feel in the room. Why are you writing this over to here where we're already struggling just to stay alive of jail and producing 112 volumes of which, you see, in this room you could say, well, what the hell are we doing? We put it out there and nobody reads it. Here's somebody who thinks he's got a real close connection with the holes, been waiting all these years Or 75? What's in the others? Maybe the secret. Maybe the answer. Well, I don't have $6 a book. Roy beats 10. These people don't have $6 a book to produce them for you. load on this group. And I said group, because there's a group here that work in different businesses and they've given everything they've got, including the profits out of one business to make sure that the other can go so you can get the word. And they have to listen, why don't you, sir, shower us with wherewithal and it will all work out magically. You have to be seeking and find what's there. We found the resources. They will come. I am not going to just ship it all off. Most will never know it has ever arrived, unfortunately, because you're looking for God in the hosts. How will you see it? I'm not going to tell anybody. That's what your corporations are for, privacy. You have to go all the way through court being badgered, hounded, everything, miserable, thrown at you to even maintain your own privacy. You'll give it away. You will give it away yourself. Usually through this opening in the lower section of your mouth, I mean your face, it's

called mouth.

Well, but everything is open. No, what you want is everybody else's stuff to be open. It is not acceptable. And I certainly am not going to be sending it away. When it's for the job we have to do, go find another host. There are a lot of them. There are a lot of them. And I don't want to lose friends, but I want to tell you, if you lose a friendship, quote, from truth, you didn't have a friend,

ma'am.

You had somebody who wanted something and expected something else. You don't have to give me anything, but I'll tell you something, you have to give it all to God. And then there's no question you get, man does he give. And then you have to be ready to receive. I am just a commander. I am a teacher. But I am a master teacher. I know who I am. And you're not going to find a better teacher. You've got levels of teachers too. And this mission is important enough that I'm here. And basically the crew is not very big. Anybody can be on the crew who wants to be, but it will not be because you want to stand out in the desert and get a ride. It would be nice wouldn't it? But you know what it wouldn't be worth it. You're getting rides. Now you want to remember? My goodness what all do you want? We'll do that How much longer is this?

That's it.

That's it?

Let's have cake now. And then we'll watch that tape and we'll see if there is enough from the audio part of it. We'll record it. That people can get some kind of an idea. You see, Nora's writing about all this. I want to make sure that Nora gets all the information she can get from it. And all of these symbols are going to be somewhere where they can be pictured, diagrammed, drawn, and we'll just, I guess, plagiarize. I don't know what else to do. Mr. Maxwell would be happy to come over and do it for you and work with Nora. You see, the ones who want truth out there are going to do anything they can do to get it out there. The ones who don't, won't. And it's that simple. And yet the ones who don't and won't, we have to go ahead and make a big flap about it and hang in there. But we'll put Mr. Russell on the map because of it, and I won't comment about the other. I think you know what will happen with the other. So let's have a break and then we'd like to watch that tape. And any kids that are too restless or whatever, let them go play, let them do whatever. Just let's, it's long enough that they will get restless probably. That's fine. You know, it will not bother but don't feel that they have to sit and suffer through it. Thank you.

you You You you You're welcome. We're going to go ahead and get started.. You Okay.......

